Macon: As Tom said in his response, if your step-daughter's self-esteem, pride, and social life are really being affected by her bedwetting, then she already has all the motivation she needs not to be lazy. Laziness may be a factor for some children, but from what you said, I doubt very seriously that laziness is the cause of your step-daughter's problem. You acknowledged that you may be insensitive to the problem because you have never had it yourself. As a bedwetter, I can assure you of how frustrating it is to cope with the helplessness of wanting desperately to be able to wake up in a dry bed, only to get up the next morning and have to accept another night of failure. It has never been laziness for me, it is a disability. I continue to be amazed at the number of people who think motivations such as star charts can help a person with a true bedwetting problem. The person is asleep when he or she wets! Is the sleeping person's brain going to think "Oh, I really want to get that star on my chart tomorrow, so I think I won't wet now!"? Of course not. The whole reason why the person wets is because the brain is not controlling what the bladder does during sleep. At age six or seven, there is still a high proportion of children who are bedwetters, and many of them will "grow out of it" on their own over the next few years. But some will not, and by age thirteen, it isn't a good idea to hope the problem will soon go away on its own without intervention. Some have had medications prescribed for the purpose, but in my family, we chose to avoid them (out of concern for possible side effects, both known and unknown). I would suggest you talk to your daughter about trying an alarm conditioning system. These have been successful for some people. They don't work for some, (and they didn't work for me) but they're worth a try. I wish you and your daughter the best of luck in overcoming her enuresis.