Dear Laura, I too have a 16 year old and yes it is a stressing age and yes having his dad depart this life two years ago is a very traumatic experience to go through My mum nd dad died and i went through Hell and high water and back. I would have him checked out by your GP and if nothing is found to be physically wrong with him and the wetting is profusly I would try ddvap tablets which is for bed wetting >again you are the parent you said if you try to discuss it rationally with him he goes into a frenzy Typical 16 year old behaviour!. have you tried an aunt whom is close to him or a grand parent whom he is close to or some one whom he confides in to speak to him (obviously some one responsible ) whom can approach the topic sympathetically asking him is he aware he wets or is he fast asleep he may like wearing nappies and developed a fetish for them !(possibility ) and wet them on purpose! when does he wet straight away? does he put on the nappy immediately he goes to bed or about an hour or two before going to bed?and lounge about in a nappy and plastic pants if that is the case it could be an indication of a fetish! all these questions need to be researched discreetly is he a heavy sleeper? if so and I know it is invading his privacy you could go in and look to see if he has wet! but obviously being discreet This some might say is invading his privacy but if he is not able to discuss it then you need to try to help him any way you can! you state he syas when you approach him he says he cannot help wetting and he has no control over it have you had him checked by your GP ask him if he wants to stop wetting at night and if he says yes then ask him is he prepaired to do something about it ie setting his alarm at a certain time and going to the Toilet!. or if he would just ignore the alarm before you going tpo bed you wake him to go to the toilet and then see what happens if he is agresive then leave well alone! hope this is of help should you require any help You may contact me at Partackuk@yahoo.com best wishes, Tom please keep us informed of your progress if any!